Nobody's perfect. In an age of two working parents or guardians, single parent houses, co-parenting, mixed families, and just plain, normal moms and dads doing the best they can, mistakes occur. Mistake number one: parents or guardians too worn out to parent.
This is probably our oldest parenting mistake. Back in "the day," parenting after a long day hunting and gathering probably looked rather more like an episode of "Survivor" instead of "The Waltons." Parents put older siblings in command of younger siblings; youngsters who could prepare food were put to work, while Mom and Dad defended the clan from predatory animals and neighbors. In true Darwinian fashion, children who did not conform to family norms probably did not survive.
Today, well-meaning, tired parents know they should not ignore misbehavior, yet frequently find that it's just easier to permit the television and Playstation to parent their youngsters. Tantrums are met with concessions. Kids learn how to act on their own reconnaissance instead of ask permission because they know consequences from tired parents and guardians can be bartered away through whining, manipulation, persistence, and even good behavior.
This leads us to mistake number two: parents and guardians that cannot apply acceptable consequences because their kid is exhibiting good behavior such as cleaning the car, vacuuming, and setting the table. Time off for good behavior only works in prison. In the home, kids are in command of their behavior choices, and parents are in command of the consequences. If kids are permitted to choose their behavior and manipulate the parental response by acting "good," this often leads to power struggles, perplexity, and more manipulation. Children shortly learn that their tired parents and guardians crave love and contentment (and a clean vehicle), and will do anything to cut down a punishment if their children reward them with good behavior and good attitudes.
Parenting isn't for the faint-hearted, and perfection in parenting is a myth! There are many time management books for moms and dads to show how to conserve energy for parenting in the midst of a hectic working schedule. Always keep an eye open for good parental advice and do your utmost to use a time management plan if you're overworked.
This is probably our oldest parenting mistake. Back in "the day," parenting after a long day hunting and gathering probably looked rather more like an episode of "Survivor" instead of "The Waltons." Parents put older siblings in command of younger siblings; youngsters who could prepare food were put to work, while Mom and Dad defended the clan from predatory animals and neighbors. In true Darwinian fashion, children who did not conform to family norms probably did not survive.
Today, well-meaning, tired parents know they should not ignore misbehavior, yet frequently find that it's just easier to permit the television and Playstation to parent their youngsters. Tantrums are met with concessions. Kids learn how to act on their own reconnaissance instead of ask permission because they know consequences from tired parents and guardians can be bartered away through whining, manipulation, persistence, and even good behavior.
This leads us to mistake number two: parents and guardians that cannot apply acceptable consequences because their kid is exhibiting good behavior such as cleaning the car, vacuuming, and setting the table. Time off for good behavior only works in prison. In the home, kids are in command of their behavior choices, and parents are in command of the consequences. If kids are permitted to choose their behavior and manipulate the parental response by acting "good," this often leads to power struggles, perplexity, and more manipulation. Children shortly learn that their tired parents and guardians crave love and contentment (and a clean vehicle), and will do anything to cut down a punishment if their children reward them with good behavior and good attitudes.
Parenting isn't for the faint-hearted, and perfection in parenting is a myth! There are many time management books for moms and dads to show how to conserve energy for parenting in the midst of a hectic working schedule. Always keep an eye open for good parental advice and do your utmost to use a time management plan if you're overworked.
About the Author:
Dr. Kate Walker is an approved professional specialist in the Woodlands, Texas. Her parental advice making sure understanding for tired parents looking for a time management plan, as well as tips for handling misbehavior to demonstrate how to effectively parent while working.
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